(The 7 Things I Learned in Life) I Got (It) Them From My Momma!
4:55:00 PM |
| My mother is GORGEOUS |
1. I love my Momma
2. I think EVERYDAY should be Mother's Day
3. My MYX video message wasn't enough
4. I love my Momma (Oh wait, didn't I already say that?)
The 7 Life Lessons I Learned from my Mama
Lesson #1: Your FAITH is very important.
I remember when I was a kid and coloring books were all the rage my mom went out and bought us a few coloring books of different Bible stories. From Joseph and His Colorful Coat to The Story of Moses- we had a coloring book for each of the popular and epic Bible stories. Now don't get me wrong, my mom is a "cool" mom. She didn't buy us these things to force us to memorize the Bible or anything, it's just that she wanted us, in our own little way, to know more about our Faith and about the Lord. Looking back, I can see how brilliant this was. Up until today, I still know the stories of Moses, Joseph, Adam & Eve and all the other important people in the Bible. All because in my spare time as a kid, I read the stories as I colored them in (Good job mom!) :)
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| My 20th birthday celebration :) |
Growing up and facing more trials, mom always told me that at the end of the day, aside from family (which may come and go), we will ALWAYS have God. And it is important to have a GOOD and STRONG relationship with Him- even when the times get tough. I remember when I was being bullied in high school, I had no one to talk to. I would cry and cry when I would get home and I remember my mom would always comfort me and tell me it was going to be okay. So that I wouldn't have to "be alone" during recess and lunch, she bought me a PLDT prepaid payphone card so that I could hang out near the guardhouse in my school and talk to her on the payphone while I ate my baon. She made sure to be home everyday (despite her many errands and plans) just so she could talk to me. How many kids can say they are that lucky?
Aside from listening to me talk about mundane things as I ate on the phone, she would tell me to visit the Chapel after we would talk and spend some time talking to God. She told me to ask Him for strength and guidance through this hard time in my life and that He was a friend I could definitely count on. So, being a good daughter (this doesn't happen often HAHA joke) I would do as she said.
I don't think I can ever thank her enough for telling me to do those things because now, I can honestly say my relationship with God is stronger than ever. You see, trusting in Him and trusting in His Timing doesn't happen over night. Having Faith and Hoping even when things are just all falling apart isn't something you can do in the snap of a finger. It takes time, commitment, trust and love. My mom taught me that. She would tell me to be patient and pray. She told me that when times get rough and I can't even pray anymore- I should pray even harder. That God listens to EVERYTHING I say and He will protect me and love me all my days. She taught me that.
You see, having Faith and building a strong relationship with the Lord doesn't take anything away from you. In fact, it blesses you with even MORE things in life. Our God is not in the "taking away" business (something I learned in Bible Study) in fact, He is in the GIVING OF PLENTY. How comforting is that? The closer we get to Him, the more we will see His wonderful plans for us. We just need to have FAITH.
Lesson #2: It is more rewarding to GIVE, than to RECEIVE.
I don't think I've ever experienced a more generous person on this Earth than my Mama. She will give you the last yummy piece of chocolate (which is meant for her) even when you've had about 6 pieces already (guilty... guilty..), she will spend the last of her pocket money during trips abroad just so you can buy this toy that you've been eyeing all day (because you finished ALL your pocket money buying other useless things), she will cancel her plans with friends because you need her, she will do anything and everything to make you happy. That's the kind of woman my Mama is.
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| Look at me! I'm so bald and carefree! Haha |
I can honestly say that the only time I realized how good it felt to give more than receive was when I got into the relationship I am in now. I am not saying I am the perfect girlfriend or the perfect person but I am so much better than I was before. I'm not as selfish, I'm not as immature. For the first time in my life, I have learned to give more to someone other than my family. And you know what? The Bubster can attest to this. I always make sure he eats plenty and is full, I always make sure that he's happy and that if there's one piece of chocolate left and he wants it, I'll give it to him. No, it's not about being "patay na patay" over someone or being "under"- it's about the joy you get when you give and it makes someone happy.
My mom, in her own little ways, loves giving back to everyone. From the tip she gives waiters (sometimes I get shocked at how much she gives) to the toys she buys for our yaya's son, everyone knows just how generous my mom is. And that's something I learned from her- the feeling you get when you GIVE, is so much more rewarding than the feeling you get when you RECEIVE.
Now that I'm earning my own money, I have never asked her for anything (except lambing and attention HAHA). I'm not letting you guys know this because I want you to think I'm some saint or whatever, but I want you all to know this because it is a testament to how my mom has raised me, has raised us. Trina and I contribute around the house. Trina pays for a whole lot more things not because my mom asked her to (my mom NEVER asks) but because Trin wants to GIVE. And now, I do the same. Granted I don't earn in the millions and I'm definitely not swimming in money, but I can honestly say that with whatever little I can give, I do. And it feels AMAZING.
Lesson #3: In whatever way you can, HELP.
Whenever I needed to cut some bond paper or I had a hard time drawing something for class I would always just shout one word and in an instant, I would have cleanly cut bond paper in all shapes and sizes and beautiful hand-drawn pictures at my disposal. You wanna know what that one word was?
"Mooooooooommmmmmmmyyyyyyy!!!!!"
Yup. I was that annoying kid (and still am) that would run to mommy for help. She would look at me, shake her head at my petty little problem and she would help me. She would show me how things were done and then she would let me try it on my own (with adult supervision of course, I was handling a sharp pair of scissors back then!). The point is that in whatever way she could, my Mom helped me. She helped all of us.
I don't know what it is about women when they become mothers but don't they just become the most helpful people out there? I know my mom is. Whether it be a donation here, volunteering there, or just good ole fashioned listening, my mom is ALWAYS there to help. No matter how small or how big your problem is, she will be there. And that is something I have learned from her. This world would be a much better place if people just learned to stop putting people down and instead help them up.
Lesson #4: Always give people the benefit of the doubt. Always.
Trust is something VERY important to me. It is important because in order to have a good relationship with anyone, you have to be able to trust them. My mom is my role model when it comes to trusting people. Why? Because she can trust anyone.
No, she's not some naive little girl who will trust a serial killer, no. But she is the type of woman who will trust you, no matter what other people say. She will befriend anyone who is in need of a friend. She is a great friend and someone who you would definitely want on your team. My mom doesn't judge- whether you have money or not, whether you're good looking or not so good looking, to her, everyone is the same. And everyone is worth a chance at getting to know.
This is something I admire from my mother and is a way that I live my life as well. I know firsthand what it's like to be judged for your past mistakes and what others say- that's why I make it a point to treat everyone as if I've never heard anything bad about them. I don't want to be judged so why should I judge? That's what my Mama taught me.
Lesson #5: Keep moving FORWARD.
My mom is really the strongest woman I know. She has been through SO much in her life and she's still standing. I really don't think I could ever be where she is now if I ever experienced even one of the things she has gone through. But you know what? My mom goes through them all, and she does it with class and grace.
Yes, there have been times that I hated her. Times that we fought so badly we didn't speak (our longest was 6 months, we weren't in a very good place and it was mainly because I was immature and insensitive and she was tired) but we're here now, still together, loving each other. My mom has been through things that they only write about in telanovelas. Honestly guys, you have no idea. But she soldiers on. That is what I admire most about her.
Getting her heartbroken when my father moved out was probably the biggest blow. I saw what it did to her and how hurt she was because she fought to the last breath just to keep our family together. She tried and tried but nothing could work because, well, somethings just have a way of unfolding. Most women (I'm not making this up, Google it if you must) spend months and months just crying in their rooms and throwing pity parties for themselves when their husbands leave. But not my mom, no. She would cry and be sad, this we all saw, but she would try her best to be strong for all of us. She would try to smile and take us out for dinners and movies and trips like we used to do with my dad. She would bend over backwards just to make us feel as if we were a "whole" family. And you know what I realized? We were. We are.
Life will throw all sorts of curveballs at us to bump us out of our comfort zones and into "reality." This is a fact. We will face many things from the financial problems, to the superficial problems, heartaches, betrayals, failures... you name it, life will throw that at us. But one thing I learned from my Ma is that in the end, we push forward. We keep fighting. Why? Because that's what we need to do. No one ever succeeded in life because they gave up. No. The only TRUE FAILURE in life is never having tried harder, never having stood up from a bad fall. We only get "stuck" in something crappy because we CHOOSE not to move forward. But we must. We have to. We owe it to ourselves and to those who love us to keep pushing.
Lesson #6: Never compare yourself to ANYONE. You are your own person.
I know kids say this about their moms and it's a given but my Mom is really the most beautiful woman I know. She's got this amazing thing about her and well, she doesn't age! Her smile is as warm as the sun, her eyes sparkle every time she laughs and just being in her presence is breath taking. She is a joy to be around and even just looking at her (in a non-creepy way) is already a joy.
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| Such a GORGEOUS lady, right?? |
My mom taught me that we are all different- from our strengths to our weaknesses, from our likes to dislikes, EVERYONE is different. Therefore, NO ONE should compare themselves to anyone. Ever. I know I am not perfect and I'm no "Angelina Jolie" but my mom always makes me feel beautiful. Whenever I feel bad about myself physically you know what she tells me?
She says this: Thank God that you were born with two eyes, a nose, legs that work and a brain that can think. You are beautiful Karla because you are a child of God (and you are my daughter and I'm gorgeous). For realz!?!? Who says these kinds of things right?! Well, my beautiful Mama does. Yeahp, she's pretty AND smart. Siya na!
Because of her I learned that it's not all about looking good, but it's about BEING good. You can't imagine how many times I've been told that I'm not pretty enough, I''m not smart enough, tall enough, I'm nothing compared to ____ or ____ and I'll never become anything because I am lacking whatever it is I am lacking. But you know what I learned? So what. So what if I'm not like whoever? So what if I'm not as smart as this person? So-Freakin-What. As long as I am living my life without hurting anyone, attacking anyone or jeopardizing my morals, then, well, SO WHAT. I have learned to stop comparing myself to people and you know what else I realized? IT FEELS SO GOOD. Instead of thinking about what I'm lacking, I think about how I can improve and become a BETTER VERSION OF MYSELF. So thanks Ma! :)
Lesson #7: Love, no matter how hard things get, always, without fail, LOVE.
The last thing I wanted to put on this list has to do with one of the first things we all think about: LOVE. The one important thing my mom taught me about life? Loving it. Loving People and loving yourself.
My mom and dad, as you all know, are separated. My dad moved out and now he's actually living in a different country. It's been 9 years. I can still remember the day it all happened and the day my father moved out. Just looking at my mom made my heartache. Why? I could see her heart, broken into a million pieces. I could see the pain in her eyes and the struggled she had not to just fall and cry forever. I know that if it had happened to me, if I were in her place, I would've willed myself to die. I would have.
And then I look back at all the disagreements I had with her. All the fights, the screaming matches, the groundings, the sneaking out, my tattoo... I look back at all the times I hurt her and you know what I realized? Not once, in any of those times, did she ever stop loving me. Not once.
In my life I've had maybe 2 major heartbreaks. And during each heartbreak I remember crying so badly and asking my mom when the pain would go away. I remember telling her I couldn't feel anything except the pain in my heart. That I could LITERALLY FEEL my heart breaking, piece by piece (can anyone relate?). And I kept telling her that I could never love again. Imagine, a kid, crying over what? A year long relationship ending to a woman who spent 25 years of her life serving her husband only to have him leave her in the end. Can you imagine how silly I looked? But you know what she told me? She held me close and told me it would be okay. She told me that I would be able to love again and that that person was not who God had planned for me. That in the right time I would find the right person and I wouldn't even remember how I felt at that moment. How each heartbreak would bring me one step closer to finding my soulmate. I don't know what I would do without her telling me those words. Imagine the strength, love and selflessness it takes to be able to tell someone that despite your own broken heart, your own pain? But my mom did it. She does it everyday.
In time I learned that we lose nothing by loving. Nothing is taking from us when we love. Sure it may hurt, sure we may not receive the same love in return but it's still love. And it still makes us better. Loving someone is a gift that we can give one another. Loving someone no matter how hurt we may feel is something that helps us grow into better people, stronger people. My mom taught me that loving is the best gift we can give and receive.
So there you go. Thank you for reading this entry and I hope you were able to pick something up from what I've learned thanks to my wonderful mother. I could not ask for a more loving, donw to Earth, God-fearing, caring, thoughtful, selfless and every other amazing adjective there is to describe the woman I get the honor of calling my Mama.
Thank you, Ma, for teaching me these things. I would not be the person I am today if it were not for you. I love you sooo much you cannot imagine. You are the best. :)
a.ka. Your Lotta :)
36 comments
Belated Happy Mother's Day to your mom. I'll continue reading this later haha (sa office pa kc ako.. LOL about to leave, nauna pa magcomment) hihi ganda ng mom mo. Its me again Bonita KARLA--- JANE :)
ReplyDeleteyour post is relatable because my mom also got through difficulties and hard times when my dad did something. (boys will be boys nga naman diba?). That's the very first time I saw my mom cried a lot. I was in HS that time and I really dont know if what will gonna happen to our family. When they were arguing and hearing things that my dad will be leaving us, that was trauma for me, kaya siguro wala akong tiwala sa mga boys because of it. (but they did not separate and I think my dad is contented already) And we may not be rich but she will make it point that she will share what she has as long as pwde pang ishare, kaya no wonder pag may kailangan yung iba siya yung tinatakbuhan. One of the most difficult but most rewarding tasks in the world is being a MOTHER. To your gorgeous mom karl please continue to be that strong role model. I salute your mom and all the moms who really wants their children to be on the right path. Again Belated Happy Mother's Day to your mommy bonita karla. . . .- JANE
DeleteHi Jane! Thank you for sharing your story. It means a lot to know that this blog can be a platform for comfort and sharing of good times and bad. Your mother sounds like a wonderful woman and you are very blessed to have such a strong example in your life. I wish you both all the best and I hope that in time the wounds will heal and there will be nothing left but love. :)
DeleteWow, we all may have different moms, but these are the exact same things that I've learned from my mom. You're mom is such a strong and beautiful woman and you're an exact reflection.:)
ReplyDeleteAnd I think all daughters are like that. This entry of yours just made me love my mom more,(As if I don't love her that much already).
Belated Happy Mothers' Day to your mom ate Karla and God Bless <3
Aww thank you so much for that! It really means a lot. I hope to become even just half the woman my mother is. She is really something else and I thank God for her talaga. We should always love our moms and be there for them cause they're always there for us. :)
DeleteI admire your mom ate Karla! :) -@rissahmargaret
ReplyDeleteThank you Rissah! :)
DeleteBelieve me if I tell you I have gone through the same situation as you are. I really admire your mom for being strong, she's truly an amazing person. I learned that in life, when it gets tough, you just have to pray hard so that you may not lose hope with everything that's making you worry and feel miserable. I still remember when people were trying to let me down, when people teased me with my physical appearance. My mom was always there to tell me that I shouldn't believe them because I'm beautiful inside and out.I don't need their approval or their thumbs up. I shouldn't bother taking out my energy by listening to their negative comments. Because in the end, it's between you and your family. In the end, we should always remember that God created us in his own image and likeness, therefore all of us are beautiful in our own ways. Indeed, moms are superheroes of a lifetime. Thank you for another inspirational blog! I always look forward to this, thank you Karla. :)
ReplyDeleteHi Jean! Your mom is right! (aren't all moms anyway?) You shouldn't let those people get the better of you- you have to be strong and just continue to soldier on. I am glad that you have a mother like yours that will forever love you and keep you safe and give you comfort. It is important, as daughters, to have really good and strong relationships with our mothers. They are our guides :) Thank you for reading and I'm glad you enjoyed this entry! :)
DeleteAre you friends with Tata Garcia? Diba you went to the same high school and college?
ReplyDeleteShe is much older than me- I don't think I ever made her about in school :)
DeleteGrabe, reading this entry made me cry. In a good way. I was so touched! Your mom is such a beautiful person inside-out, no wonder you are too :) Btw, my parents are also separated and I have always admired moms who take care of their families without their partners. I love my mom so much too, and I adore her so much. Although she may not hear it from me all the time I really am proud that she is my mama. Thanks for such a great read Ms. Karla! Love it! :)
ReplyDeleteHi Kathleen! Aww I am so happy for you that despite how tough times may get, you have the love of your mama to keep you strong. I'm glad that you are able to move forward and just continue living life the best way you can. I am very happy for you and I know that God will continue to bless you and your family :)
DeleteThis is your best blog entry karla :) Your mom is so beautiful and you look so much like her it's crazy. It still amazes me how a person like you can be so kind and adorable. You are just every mother's dream daughter. I really love reading your blogs 'cause it inspires me to be a better person than I am today, your blogs are not just pa-cute blogs unlike others. You know sometimes I feel insecure with you (in a good way) hehe which makes me want to be better, you are really an inspiration! I just want to thank you for sharing us a bit of yourself and of your life :) And kudos to your mom for bringing such a child like you! Godbless Karla :)
ReplyDeleteHi there! Aww thank you, I think this is one of my better entries as well because it's about one of the best people in the world. :) I'm definitely FAR for every mother's dream daughter, I have my moments but I try as much as possible to make up for it. We all have to just be more patient with each other, me thinks. :) I'm so glad you find substance in this blog!!! That's what I love hearing the most- I'm more of a content type of person and I always want to make sure that my entries, though sometimes random and weird, have some sort of substance Hehe :P
DeleteI love your post. It made me cry and think about all the things and problems that I had with my mom. This made me realize that I should start being closer to her because she is the only one who can understand what I feel through ny problems and all the crazy stuff in my life. God Bless Karla. :)
ReplyDeleteHi Krystyna! Aww thank you so much, I do hope you try to make your relationship with your mom better. We all have our issues and problems with our mothers but we have to constantly remember that they do really love us. Hope things go great, sweets! :)
DeleteHello Ate Karla! I love your blog. You are funny, inspiring, and you have a way with words! <3 Hahaha Continue on making awesome and heart-warming posts like these. Nainspire akong gumawa ng blog of my own dahil sayo!! =))
ReplyDeleteHi there! Thank you so much- I'm glad you found substance in this entry and it in some way has inspired you. :) You should definitely start your own blog!!!!
DeleteThis is so sweet Karla! :) Your Mommas is so beautiful and gorgeous! Like mother like daughter! :) i just want to ask, what color is your hair and do you mind if i also ask where did you have it done? Thanks Karla and kore power you, your career, you and Nico and your family. <3
ReplyDeleteThank you very much. My mom really is beautiful, inside and out. :) It's a copper blonde shade and I got it done in FIX Vmall branch! Look for Celie :)
DeleteI hope your Mommy gets a chance to read this, Ate Karla!!! :-) Just by reading this entry, she has definitely raised you well to be an amazing child of God (There's like that!). You only have one sister, ate?
ReplyDeletePS I don't know but any entry about family just hits my heart / bones / soul and everything else. I hope you post more about your family, so we could get to know you better <3 Keep it up!
She did- I printed her a copy too Hihi :) Aww thank you so much! Means a lot. I have two older sisters actually. Thank you, I definitely will write more entries :)
DeleteYou and your mom definitely look gorgeous!! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Denise!!! I wish I could be even just HALF as gorgeous as she is Hihi :)
Deleteaaaaaah! this made me cry. so true! honestly, I'm still immature. pero I know naman na lahat nagdaan dito. sa gantong stage. you're so BLESSED. and your Mom also, for having you as her daughter. and yeah LUCKY is not the right term. BLESSED is the right term. a YOU're really an inspiration. God Luck with your job. love yah! :*
ReplyDeleteand you're not pretty ate. you're Gorgeous. :))
DeleteHi Joyce! Aww thank you so much, that's so sweet of you talaga. Yes, I prefer BLESSED talaga instead of LUCKY. God continues to bless all of us and we should always remember to be grateful for it all :)
DeleteI was actually reading all your answers to the anons Qs and watching your video blogs on Tumblr. Then, I suddenly saw your blog spot so went to it. I have to say that you're one of the few amazing people I know though I really don't know you personally. Your name was first introduced to me when I first watched an ADMU-UST game live, and right there I knew it wasn't just your pretty face that inspires other people especially the ladies but it's more of how you face life beautifully with God in your heart. God Bless Ms. Karla!
ReplyDeleteHi Yvey! I like your name, it sounds so cool! (I'm pronouncing it as "Ay-Vee" btw, is that correct? Hihi) and thank you so much!!! That really means a lot to know that even if we haven't met or had a conversation, you can already tell from my blog entries what kind of a person I am. Thank you so much for being so sweet and letting me know your thoughts through your comment. Trust me when I say I don't think I'll ever get used to the sweetness from my readers who I consider friends. So again, thank you. Hope to meet you soon :)
DeleteThis has got to be one of my fave entries in the whole wide world! Seriously, made me cry. So touching and heart-warming. You are very blessed to have a wonderful mom, Karla. And she is too because you are an amazing lady a lot of people (including me) look up to. I wish to meet you in person someday. Too bad you're flying here in Cebu the day I'm flying out, maybe next time I can catch you somewhere (non-stalker way). Hihi Stay as you are! I love you, no kidd. You are my peg in life! xox, Arlene
ReplyDeleteHi Arlene! Aww shucks, it would've been great to meet you! But hopefully we will meet soon. Thank you so much for your kind words- I'm glad that this entry has touched your heart in a way and I'm glad I am able to share my mom's strength and true beauty with my readers. She is definitely someone worth getting to know. Thank you so much for reading my blog!!! :):):)
DeleteWhile I'm reading your entry I really cried. Thank you for sharing half of your life to us and how beautiful life can be.you're so great and carefree! I love everything about you! Hope one day I'm gonna meet you in person! Such a gawjus! Your ate and mum too..
ReplyDeleteLove you karla ♥ and I always keep on reading your blog, watching you on tv. Goodluck and Godbless!
Tahnk you so much, sweetie! It really means a lot to know that my blog entries can touch people's lives and make them hope for the best and want to become better! I'm glad to know that you care enough to let me know how you feel, thank you so much! I do hope we can meet soon :)
DeleteHi Karla, I'm currently reading your blog while at work (oops..) and I am crying! Doing my best to stop the waterworks right here hahaha :P I just want to thank you for sharing these thoughts to me, to everyone. My mom and I are currently going through a tough time, we're not fighting but I don't feel like we're connecting. I don't know why I'm putting up these walls and I do not know how to break them. I love her dearly and I will do anything for her but.. We barely even talk at home. I don't talk to her about my boy problems or any problem actually, when she should be the one I should talk to first. How do I reach out? I'm getting older yet I don't feel like I'm maturing. :(
ReplyDeleteI also want to thank you for your Peace Be With You post. This is kinda mababaw but I can relate it to my current lovelife situation (or the lack of it hahaha) I know that God has plans and He is teaching me to be patient. The problem with me is that I don't do anything about it, like I said, I'm getting older but I am not maturing. And I know this is what I have to change. I get days when I feel depressed about my current situation but I don't do anything about it. It's just that I do not know where and how to start. I vow to change, to DO something but then I go back to my old habits.
Sorry (and thank you hehe) for pouring it all out here. Got carried away I guess. Feels good to let all these feelings out though, hope you don't mind. :) And I hope I could be more like you - strong, mature, building healthy relationships with your family, friends and your boyfriend. One step at a time right? Thank you for inspiring me as well as all the other girls here. :) - P
Hi P! It takes a lot of strength, humility and maturity to already admit to yourself and to the people around you that you are aging but not maturing. That is already a sign of growth and you have to realize that. You know, moms and daughters will always have rough patches in their relationships- it doesn't always mean that you guys fight but sometimes there's a drift- what's important is that you realize the distance and work your way towards closeness.
DeleteYou gave to remember that your mom loves you. No matter what you do or say she will always love you. That's what moms do. They love. Never believe that 'you can't do anything about it' because everything in life is a choice. If you want to change how you see things or treat certain issues then that's YOUR choice. We always have a choice in whatever happens to us.
It's always one step at a time, so never rush anything. Just be patient and pray. :)
Thanks for reading my entry! I hope you enjoyed it. :)